Q: Why was the cook put in jail. A: He has killed 2 people and robbed several stores

what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

"hey do you know the date" "58"

Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

What's the difference between a mexican and a park bench? One is a minority whose ancestors originally lived in the central american country of Mexico, the other is a useful convenience that provides a place to rest one's legs in a public place.

5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

Your mother is so fat that she has a very big butt and large breasts, which is quite attractive to some men, especially if they are open-minded.

A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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