Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because it is very difficult for someone with a vision impairment to operate a vehicle.

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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How many fingers am i holding up? 4

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

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How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

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Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

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What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

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How many blondes does it take to walk into a bar? One I guess. I don't know if I understand the question.

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whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

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How do you kill a black man? You cn coz he'll beat you up first

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead of getting hit by the plane because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and ever since he was 8 years old he has wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

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Stephen Hawking

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What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops