a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

What do you call a monkey lost in a desert? A donkey who was forgotten by his owner.

Me Neither.

This is not a joke.... It is mind rape.

What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is prevalent.

Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

Whats worse than tripping? Getting shot

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

Statistics show That people with the most birthdays Live the longest

Q:What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpion

what's the difference between a duck?

What do you call a black man approaching your car in uniform whose name happens to be Darius? Officer Darius.

What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

what do u call a fat guy in a pool u

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

A horse shits himself SHITLESS!

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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