What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

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Judge: Why did you hit your wife with a hockey stick, Mr. Johnson? Mr. Johnson: My father and mother were mutually abusive when I grew up. As you may have guessed, this gave me a skewed view of the dynamics between husband and wife, as well as causing me to hide my emotions from myself as a defense mechanism. As a sociopath, I feel no remorse for this occurrence.

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Did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off, how is he? Well you see, the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off...He's dead. I..um..he's straight up dead. I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell ya.

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where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

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One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

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What did the man do when he went to the toilet went toilet

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Billy: Hey Timmy, you're so fat your high school picture was an aerial photograph Timmy: Oh yeah? Well you're so fat when you tried to take that photograph the helicopter pilot told you to get out because you're too fat

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What do you call a black lady with big boobs? Oh, wait, it's just a fat black guy.

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what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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Dad: sussy, do you know how you were made? Sussy: No, how? Dad: With this DICK!!

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why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

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Alot of people try to make shitty jokes on this webpage, thinking they're funny. They aren't.

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Why celebrate your birthday, its just getting closer and closer the death.

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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