What do you do to a little boy who just called you fat? Throw a rhino at him!

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Roses are red, violets are blue. You're dog is dead. And so is your family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

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A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

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why did the duck cross the road? because his d**k was stuck in the chickens a**....

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

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woman's lacrosse

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What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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kushagra tyagi

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compardre No Pew.. Pew.. At mi OINK.. OINKs...

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Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

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How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

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why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

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Q: Why was the black man good at basketball? A: because he practiced

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican are on a boat, stranded in the middle of the ocean. Feeling a bit hot due to the above average temperature of an early april afternoon, the white guy and the mexican strip down to enjoy a refreshing dip in the water a few feet from the boat. The black guy, feeling a bit left-out and perhaps even envious at the apparent fun of the other two, speaks up "Hey fellas, do you think one of you could come sit in the boat so it doesn't float away so that maybe I can enjoy the water too?" Hearing this, the white guy and the mexican look at each other utterly astonished. Grasping for a rebuttal, the white guy gathers some courage and says "Do you really think that's a good idea?... You JUST finished your sandwich."

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Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

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A man has a meeting with his doctor and his doctor says "I have some bad news, you have cancer and you have alzheimer's," to which the man replies... "Well at least I don't have cancer." This is an example of a fallacy claim.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The fact that you actually took time to read this cynically hypnotizing answer that you cannot seem to stop reading even though you know that this sentence is just a clever run to show the epitomy of the anti joke. ha-ha.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

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Q. What did the atheist ask the pregnant woman? A. You gonna eat that?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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