Chuck Norris is so strong that he could bench almost 250 pounds in his heyday.

What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

An old man walks into a grocery store, but doesn't come out. What happened? A plane crashed into the grocery store, killing everyone inside.

Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

why does beyonce sing " to the left, to the left"? - cause black people have no rights

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

A horse walks into a bar. Just kidding, it's a panda.

A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

What is is one good thing about global Waming? Nothing.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Mr Dalgleish in a formal setting, Kenny in an informal one.

telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

Why did the boy cut his hair? Because he was large.

Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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