What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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what do you call a dog with no legs? whatever his owner named him it is a shame he can`t run and play with other dogs.

What did the man with cancer say when he got hit in the face with a crowbar? "Ow."

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

Why did the man give money to a drug dealer? He lost a bet.

Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

What's worse than finding out your dad has AIDS? Finding out your little brother also has it, but you and your mother don't.

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

Why did the goat cross the street? It was running away from the Tsunami

Q: What's white, is Mel Gibson, and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree? A: Mel Gibson.

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

how do you stop a baby from crying? hit it with a brick.

If your riding your bicycle down the railroad tracks and your wings fall off how much icecrea does it take to fill a upside down doghouse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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