So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

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Me: How can you tell if somebody's a Nazi? Friend: How? Me: Their killing people in a ghetto. Friend: My friend was shot in a ghetto. Me: So, does that make him a Jew? Friend: No, he was just killed in a big ass oven.

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What do you call a Mentally Challenged Black Man? Whatever Name his parent(s) Gave him at birth.

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Women's Rights.

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why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is dead. What's worse that that? It's eating it's way out. What's worse than that? It made it. What's worse than that? It went back in for 2nd's.

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Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

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Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

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I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

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What do you call two gays with small dicks? Trace and Jacob

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whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

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Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

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Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

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When do doctors make house calls? When you're sick.

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Why is the Mexican a gardener? He has a mental disability that makes him unable to do more than a simple task.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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What happens when you hit a black guy with your car? He is seriously injured.

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What is an emulation? I am not as stupid as I seem by the way, I am just a bit shaky myself, but don't you worry i will answer whatever you need,

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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