How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

Why does Apple hate Blackberry? They don't fruit can be rivals.

So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

How can you tell if an elephant has been in your fridge? Broken fridge.

Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

What did the cancer patient say to the other cancer patient? Nothing, he was dead.

What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

what did one mute say to the other? Nothing.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

A black man, a white man, and a group of Jews were all walking down the street. They got hit by a bus.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

HOLY SHIT!!!!

Yo mamma is so fat that she is likely to consume large amounts of food regularly.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What do you call a fridge? A Fridge

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

Dakota Fanning

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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