Why did the chicken cross the road? He was depressed for a long time and decided to end his life by getting hit by a car.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

how do u drown a blond you put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

Due to the wildlife conservation program prevalent in the neighborhood, the chicken was able to cross the road safely.

A man walks into a bar. Cool story, bro.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

What is sticky and smelly - a stick

Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Hurricane Sandy should be named A-Rod. Cuz he dosent hit anything

What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

How do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face.

while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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