Why wasn't the old woman sitting on the porch? Because she got raped by a big scorpian.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

Two clowns are walking down the street The first says, "Whats better sunshine or rainbows?" The second says nothing, then casually picks up a brick and beats the other clown to death.

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

What two states don't have running water? Solid and gas

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: She was going to speek at a PETA meeting about the cruel conditions of chicken farms. I hit her with my car

Hello Braydon I am at home where are you?

What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

What is the funniest joke in the world? Written.

What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

whats worse than getting raped by ben rothlesburger well rape-victims claim that rape has ruined their lives and most of them go into deep depression and need therapy so maybe the only worse thing is getting raped again by kobe ---sticksack

2 corpses are sitting on a bridge one fell down both are dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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