How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven, they get burned because the oven was left on for to long and they end up being thrown away.

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So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

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A Palestinian woman walks into a library. She is promptly stoned to death.

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How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Though if the ladder is rickety and she needs someone to steady it for her, two.

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Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

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Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

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What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

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Q:Why did the baby cross the road? A: It was stapled to the chicken

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what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

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What do you call a creepy person trying to break into your house? A robber

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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Vagina cream... end of story

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Q-how many dead babies does it take to paint your geradge door? A-one if you throw it hard enough

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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What do you get if you cross an angle with an antelope? An anglelope.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops