What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

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One day a object is flying overhead in a city and a man in a crowd of pedestrians yells, "It's a bird!" another man yells, "It's a plane!" No one else says anything as they stare at the two men that had become so excited about a possibly seeing a bird or an airplane.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

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Row, row, row your... Canoe.

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Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

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Q: what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? A: A very unfortunate individual.

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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Legal Mexicans in Texas

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Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

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Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

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i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

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Q:Why was the frog sad A:He was stapeld to a boys face.

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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