What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Two nerds walk into a bar. The effects of alcohol do not discriminate based upon the social status of said consumer.

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A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

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Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

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shut up kobe!

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What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water jack fell down and broke his neck and he was dead... The End

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Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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what is red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket Waht is blue and looks like a bucket? (99% of the time they will say "a blue bucket") No, a red bucket in disguise!

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whats worse than killing someone? finding out your mom is your dad

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what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

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That day where Captain America becomes too weak and frail to hold his own shield.

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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The power of Mindfuck: What if you can only walk left when you are right? And if you can walk right when you are the only one left? What is left when everything is right? Moral: Create a right world by taking the left road? YOU PIECE OF FILTH!

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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