Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Depending on the amount of saliva you produce each lick the answer to this question varies species to species.

Ben Wuz here was the funniest Hahahahaha

A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

hey fat ass u want some butter with them rolls?

How do you torture a turtle? If you came up with an answer to that question you are completely and utterly unethical and immoral.

What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

VAL SUCKS

Why couldn't the kid get into see the pairate movie? It was rated PG-13 and he was only 11. Plus he had no money and his mother didnt want him watching movies like that.

What did Robert Kardashian say at O.J.'s most recent trial? Nothing. He died of esophagal cancer

Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

what did one dinosaur say to the other? "rawr"

Where can I apply for janitor school?

What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

A stripper walks into a bar. She works there.

What happens when you roll a quarter down the street in Mexico? It rolls for a small period of time but eventually it falls over and stops rolling because quarters aren't able to roll very far on imperfect surfaces.

What's weirder than an asian? His dinner

A black man, a Mexican man, and a cop are walking in downtown New York. So are tens of thousands of other people, because it is a very large and diverse city.

What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

Why did the frog cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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