What did the scuba diver say to his partner when he got stuck in some seaweed. Something that sort of sounded like glug, or maybe blub, or some other sound you would hear trying to talk underwater.

Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

what did your mom say when she did crack? i am so f***ed up its not even funny, i mean, i literally screwed the racoon in our back yard. i certainly remember a lot of drugs and alcohol. i am pretty sure i raped your friend, billy. I also went all lezbo on your girlfriend. i murdered your brother. he was telling me to stop, so i lit him on fire and made him eat cigarettes. the very abusive mother was then charged with murder, rape, possesion of illegal drugs, assault and several other charges involving that one crazy night. refrigerator.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

why are chickens dying so fast? because black people are hungry.

Why did the boy have sex with his grandpa? His grandpa is a nice guy and it was his birthday.

Justin Bieber.

Mum says therirs ups in life... I have the Downs

What is the difference between a tree and a person? Trees don't scream when hit with an axe.

-Knock-knock. -Who's there? -Interrupting Doctor. -Interrup.. -You have cancer.

There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

A black man walks in to a bar and say ouch! A jewish man walks in to a bar and later sews that same bar for he and the black mans injurys.

Roses are Red, violets are blue,love can not tell how much I love you!!

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was shot in the face

What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

I agree Detroit sux. But the bulls suk too ya know

Women's Rights

Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

What happened to the lion which escaped from the zoo? It was successfully recaptured.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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