The moment where Perfect Cell returns declaring he has become "even more perfect" There is no level above perfect :P But sure Cell, strive to improve further on your "perfection", oh he is dead nevermind. Still my favorite character, narcissist, with a touch of class, and a sadistic personality, what more can you wish for?

How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

What do astronauts do if the want a party? They planet

I was so fat I went on a diet

nobody move, or i'll kill myself, then her!

What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

One night, a heartbroken magician named Jeff went to a bar. Jeff met a nice girl, and they talked and laughed together for hours. After a while, Jeff asked her, "do you want to see a magic trick?" She ate his wiener.

Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

Whats worse then 15 missed calls from your mom?, The Holocaust

A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

Why did the father smash his sons head into the dentist's building? Because he had a locker in his mouth. Also, equestrian.

Two Cows are knitting soda water in a lightbulb. One of them said: Talking about milk, what time is it? The other pulls out a thermometer, looked at it and said: Wednesday.

"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

What has stripes, isn't a virgin, and has golden hands? I don't know I asked you first.

why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

I read the terms of service.

if my evil next door neighbor is building a rocket to steal the moon with the help of 3 little girls, a grumpy old man and about 5000 small yellow poeple; what do i do? get sued for coping a copyrighted movie plot

what did the tomato say when he was cut open? nothing, because vegetables are unable to speak

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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