How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

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How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

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How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

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Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

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Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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Hi i love black men so much and i am a jewish faggot bye

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Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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89 bottles of beer on the wall, 89 bottles of beer, if one alcoholic passes the wall, 0 bottles of beer on the wall!

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why was the woman afraid of her bestfriend he raped her

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What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

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If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

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What did the biscuit say when he saw his friend get run over? Oh my god. Dave, are you ok? Somebody call an ambulance.

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a piece of toast.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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