Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

HOLY SHIT!!!!

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

What did the monkey say to the receptionist? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

your moms my other ride

What is old and fancy and comes in two pieces? Marie Antoinette.

What do you get when you cross a man with a horse? The Nobel Prize for your advancement of genetic sciences; centaurs aren’t real.

What worse than finding crap on the road? Tripping over and landing on it.

Why was the boy sad? Because He had a frog stapled to his face

Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick

so a man walks into a bar *pint of bud there please

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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