why did the baby die ? he fell down the stairs

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squash squash who squash my ass

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

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I regret everything.....

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What did one umbrella say to the other umbrella? Nothing, umbrellas cannot instigate a conversation, because they cannot talk.

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when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

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Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

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Thumbs up if you're reading this in 2015!

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Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

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how do you boil oil? add b to oil

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An asian man, a black man, and a white man walk into a bar. All three of them order a scotch, coincidentally this is their favorite beverage.

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Two horses are playing in a field, One says to the other "Hey, sup" they then continue playing.

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Did you hear about Billy's magic trick? No? Don't worry, it was a trick question.

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

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What is Hitler's least favorite month? July...

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

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What do you call an African American who flies a plane? A Pilot

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What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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on a scale from a banana to a pound coin - how much do you like the works of antonio vivaldi?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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