Are you the only 10 I see? Because I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

3 men walk into a bank. They rob the bank and kil 13 hostages.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what is white and sticky a stick from a birch tree

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the baby stop crying his mother killed him with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A blonde walks into a bar ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +3

YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a horse with wings and a horn on his head? Drunk

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock-knock? Who's there? I... I dunno I was planning on thinking of a joke before you said who's there, but I ran out of time.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Make it? Sodium levels? Means he is eating right? Its not ADHD, the chatter is his way of coping with pain and what I believe is PTSD (dont tell him, he would get mad, if he gets that blank stare while chatting a lot its like he is back in the past for a while, please distract him out of it, but dont tell him anything about that. Give him what he wants, its a secret but Nero masters hypnosis, and he pretty much knows himself to a point far beyond others know themselves, he can sense lies and knows how others are feeling just by the movement of their pupils, their eyes, their breath, the tonality of their voice and lots of things like that, I think thats some sort of hypnosis as well, he uses ritalin in order to focus and shut off pain receptors mentally and stuff I don't understand, I am sure he would not ask for it unless he knew he could take it, he has literally performed surgery on himself before, the kind that would kill anyone unless under strong anesthetics. (removed bullets from the back of his skull, people say its just a myth, but I was there so I know its true) Please trust me on this as weird as it might sound.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the black man have drugs? He had a very serious medical condition that involved putting himself at a high risk at any time without proper medications, therefore he requires drugs to sustain him and hopefully prevent him from dying. To immediately believe that he was in possession of illegal drugs is a very racist assumption that is representative of one of the numerous racial problems that faces our society today.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I forgot my joke about gamblers, but i bet you would have loved it!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

thumb_up thumb_down +1

People Eating Tasty Animals

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The woman says : OMG I am so hung over!! The man next to her has Terrible tourertts turns around and shouts I want my to make them hung over your face, her then moves away and rapes a apple of which he is eating, the woman turns around and dies as she has a brain tumor

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did michael jackson wear white gloves around young boys? His doctor recommended that he do so due to bad circulation.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the plane crash. its pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the difference between a white man and black man who are facing each other? They have different rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops