What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

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Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

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What's the difference between a Green Grocers and Fighter pilot! One flys a plane and one sells food.

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how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

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Did you hear about the guy who did a backflip off the cliff? He died

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What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

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How many pencils does it take to get an A on a test? Actually it takes knowledge.

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

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Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A woman went outside for some fresh air.

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What is the funniest joke in the world? Written.

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why was the man sad? he found out his wife was man .

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You suck big fat slobber

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A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

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Why didnt the boy eat his ice cream? Because he is dairy intolerant

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How do you kill Chuck Norris. Shoot him in the face

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men jump out, and the plane crashes anyway.

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What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

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Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they're all dead.

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There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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