You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

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How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

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what do you get when you mix a shit zoo and a pitbull......"bull shit" oh this joke sucks well my life is over

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

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Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

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What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

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How do you make transportation in Harlem easier? Fix the roads and put in more stoplights.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

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Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

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Whats more realistic than evolution? Everything

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What did tarzan say when he saw the elephants? Here come the elephants

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What did jesus REALLY say while walking on water? "I really hope I find a nice patch of sand to swim in."

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Did you hear about that superman guy? He died.

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area.

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whoever said we're all soft on the inside was probably not an experienced doctor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

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DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

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Alright alright Tifa, you look totally different from your drawn identical twin. And yeah I could have been a bit more subtle, don't you worry, I have a special knack for SPAMMING COMMENTS INTO THE ABYSS! I mean sheesh you where pretty open about it earlier, and you said you did not give a damn about what random people thought... Moral: But yeah, I can do better than that, I just do not want to, no seriously, if you are going to go feeling ashamed, then I have failed you.

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Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Loner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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