Who could be happier than a kid at a candyshop? A necrophiliac in a morgue

You know that feeling you get when you see your crush walking towards you? No, I'm blind.

What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

what makes reed stop talking? LYRENS SHARPENED PENCIL

What did the boy do before school? Jacked off.

What's made of wood and has an eraser? a 2x4 i lied about the eraser.

yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

What do you call a black man with pearl white teeth ? A man with good dental hygiene.

What did the dog say to the cat before they fought? Lets fight

A man walks into a bar The bar now has a hole in it.

Whats very large and produces alot of seamen. The US navy

Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

What's funnier than 68? Will ferrel

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Why was a group of children being driven away by a black man? Michael was the students bus driver, he was taking them to the zoo.

Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms..

Not everyone with a mustache is a child molester, but not every child molester has a mustache.

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because as an animal with legs it is highly capable of doing such as it pleases.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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