What did the Jewish man say when he answered the phone? Hello?

How many pairings of animals did Moses collect before the rain started? 1. 500 2. 50000 3. 500000000 4. Nobody really knows 5. It was Noah... Moral: Lol.

What did the blonde say when she found a dead bird on the sidewalk? "Aww, look at the poor dead bird!"

Roses are red Violets are red Oh sh*t the gardens on fire

why didn't little johnny show up to school on friday? little johnny died two months ago from cancer. he hasn't been to school in a year.

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

Thumbs this down

what time is it? 3:16

What do retards say when someone knocks on the door... NOBY HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....................and that concludes our moment of silence

a gay guy walks into a bar what does he do? buys a drink after a hard day at work

Why did the whale cross the ocean? To reproduce as a way of life.

A little girl had a sleepover with her friends. They watched a movie, then went to bed at a reasonable time. /

Roses are red violets are blue you have cancer......

What has 7 mouths 3 eyes and 5 noses Something very ugly

Why do guys love to wrestle? They like to have physical contact with other men.

Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

Okay, I just really want you to trust me again,

Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

who is mark

A blonde walks into a bar. She just graduated university and thought she would celebrate with a beer.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

Man: Are you tired Woman: No why? Man: You have bags under your eyes and you just yawned a minute ago

What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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