There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A white guy, a hispanic guy, and asian, a black guy, a philipiean guy, and a wait what am i doing?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

where wally? wallys a myth.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Johnny stop walking halfway to school? A fridge fell on him.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do u call a man with no arms and no legs and is laying in front of a door? Matt

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I ponder

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man burps while sitting at dinner. Everyone suddenly stops eating and stares at him. How does he get out of it? Answer: He says, "Excuse me."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The BCS

thumb_up thumb_down +12

There is a black guy, British guy, and a Spanish guy in a room. Wait that'll never happen, black people hate Spanish people.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Did you know brown and green rhyme? Just not with each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Guess what! what haha u listened to me

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why wasn't the drunk driver arrested when he killed a man? Because he died as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why was 6 afraid of 7 He raped him the other day

thumb_up thumb_down +12

poop

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the mushroom get invited to the party? He is a fun-gi!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops