What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

What did the kid say when you gave him a cookie? Thank you.

Where's my tractor?

why did the baby bird fall out of the nest? while the mother bird was away a cat knocked over the nest. needless to say the baby bird died.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings. whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 beestings

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

George Bush.

A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

http://anti-joke.com/

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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