Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

two men where hunting one man shot a deer and ate it, the other man shot the man who killed the deer and made human steaks. a day later he killed his family. and ate them with his dog. he then grabbed the deer that was left in his fridge and used it to make a fire.

Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

The easter bunny should be a platypus. Bunnies do not lay eggs. Platypuses do, however, and are the only mammals that lay eggs.

What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

The blonde is in the park withb a rope a man passes and says what are u doing, she says im goin o hang and kill myself. the next day the man comes back and sees the blonde there alive he says i thought u were goin hang yourself she says i tried but i couldnt breathe.

What can a pizza do that a Jew can't? Pizzas can't do anything, so the answers are infinite.

A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

Wanna hear a joke? Women's Basketball

What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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