whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

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Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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