Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

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why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

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Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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