What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

what did the father say to his son whom had only one arm? hey son.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

thumb_up thumb_down +44

knok knok whos there know one cares your gay

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops