Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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Do you play piano? No

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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