Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

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sadf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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