Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops