Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

Did you hear about the guy that lost the whole left side of his body? Well, he's all right.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Women outside of the kitchen.

Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

Dwarf Shortage

What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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