Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

Who died first the cow or the cow? The Cow

Reading the Terms and Conditions

My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Person A "did you hear about the cure for AIDS?" Person B "no." Person A "neither did I."

Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

I'm Polish.

Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

Why did the book fly to Cambodia? It was on a plane that was delivering educational material to third world countries to enhance their schools and increase their literacy.

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

A man is pulled over for drunk driving, and is asked to say the alphabet backwards. When requested to do so, the man says, "officer, I can't even do that when I'm sober," thus admitting that he is drunk. The police officer chuckles at the drunk man's stupidity, and wonders whether or not his wife would find the incident funny. After all, they do share a similar sense of humor.

There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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