What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

thumb_up thumb_down

1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My cat just died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops