What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

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What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

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i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

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Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

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Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

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What's the difference between a book. A tree's leaves hit the trash cans

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops