Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you are my slave, get back to work!

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. . I am a whale

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Q: Knock Knock!?! A: Lettem' in!!!!

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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a christian man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a jewish man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a muslim man asked god a question. he too, did not get an answer. an atheist man asked god a question. he got his answer.

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how do demolish a building alkekwhakbar

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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So a cat a dog are in a field.The dog then proceeds to eat the cat and take a nap

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Why did the boy fail math? He got bad grades.

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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I need a side cart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cause he was a chicken.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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