My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

What's 1+1? 69.

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

Knock Knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? You are you.

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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