What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

He who laughs last gathers no moss.

Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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