What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

There's an Irishman, a homo-sexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community!

A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

Tilt your screen back

What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

What did the blind man say to his teacher? Nothing, blind people can't talk.

What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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