Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

school homewrok

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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