Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

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A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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