There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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