What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

roses are red, violets are blue, penis

A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a tape worm in your apple.

Uh Oh you just fell, So, So I've got one thing to say to you, And what's that Don't fall it gets you down!!!!!!!!

knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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