my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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school homewrok

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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