Screw it you write the joke.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

Why did Sally cross the road? Because a rapist was chasing her

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

A drunk guy walks into a car

A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

A man walks into a bar, he obtains an alcoholic beverage from the store neighboring this bar which he bumped into.

"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

God Does exist to all thoes atheist out there!!! All you have to have is faith. I corinthians 1:18 "for the message of the cross is foolishness to thoes who are perishing, but for thoes who are saved it is the power in christ Jesus!! <3

What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

how do you make a cripple depressed? stairs..

How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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