A devout Christian dies. Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Fags aren't allowed in Heaven.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Stephen Hawking can walk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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Shit, I can't think of anything to write. That does not mean I'm black

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Womens rights.

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Two Muslim men board an American Airlines jet. Nobody feels threatened and engage in friendly conversations with the passengers. The aircraft explodes due to poorly manufactured engine parts made by small starving children.

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What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

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What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

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why did jimmy fall of of the tractor? Because he is a potato

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FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

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What do you say to Michael and Justin? The Game

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why was the black mans shirt ripped? because he escaped genocide in africa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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