Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the man say to th tiger? Nothing, a tiger is a dangerous and vicious animal. It then ripped him to pieces. Is family mourned after for a very long time till they came to grips with the death of the main income in their family. Aids

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops