There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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NEVER

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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