Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

Do you know what kind of world I dream of? Until you tell me, no I don't. How could I? I'm not telepathic, after all.

How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Faithful men.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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