What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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What's 9+10? 19

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Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

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I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

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How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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What did your Little brother get for Christmas? Lice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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