What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

How do you call leprechaun with leprosy? Sick.

What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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