What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...