Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

There's an Irishman, a homo-sexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community!

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

Tilt your screen back

stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

What did the blind man say to his teacher? Nothing, blind people can't talk.

What is ET short for? Extra terrestrial

What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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