What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

Robin get in the batmobile!

Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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