Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

Guess what? I like trains.

You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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