Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-gaurds, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Froghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Froghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

I'm rick james bitch

Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

How you know when dislextic

A knock knock B who's there A nobody

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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