What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

Three baby seals walk into a club...

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

What's funnier than New York City? ADAM STOCK! By Logan in South Dakota

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

were you expecting a joke

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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