What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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