there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

Denard Robinson

Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

if you are reading this your wasting your time

Wanna hear a joke? no

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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