your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

What do short Mexicans do after a hot shower? Dry off with a towel like everyone else,

What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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