Ubisoft presents a game by ubisoft

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

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If you have a stroke, call 000

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops