A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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13 =B you just learned something

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

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12 in general

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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