so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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