You know whats annoying? Steve

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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Why did the boy fall off the swing?

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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