Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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What do you call a woman who can't walk? A paraplegic.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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Q: Why did the black man call the white man a rasict? A:because he called him black.

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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What's worse then the holocaust? Stepping on a lego.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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