Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

A Chinese man fails a math test

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

One more note for my children: ...My words appeal to your dark, evil side, it is that which might trigger your fear and disgust... But dont blame your fear on me you moron... ....To those that react with fear and disgust towards my comments: You know the fear and disgust in you, your own emotions make you feel fear and disgust for yourselves, because like all and everything that feels the inspiring words of the Black Angel... ...You know you like it ;) The friendly Black Angel/R*pist: God can free you from the temptation I inspired in your heart, but why would you? Now, thumb this comment down, so you can feel "good about yourself" and suffer in life in order to become a slave and serve the one that made you suffer troughout life... You think me, yet you fail to see that if it where me, I would have be Jehovah your GOD!... ...Worry not though, all of those that plan to stick alive for 10-15 years and I allow to live, will get to serve The Only God, your EMPEROR: Moral Man... Know my name and fear it, and yes mortal, you will also be screaming it...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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